Moments Like These
by mrscarstairs
Summary: A few years after their reunion, Tessa must come to terms with some life-changing news, including how she will announce it to Jem. Post-Clockwork Princess (obviously).


**A/N: This is for the beautiful, amazing, flawless Michelle, who happens to be my birthday buddy. And to celebrate, I have written her a Jessa fic. I did my very best, and even though a couple fics have already been written focusing on this particular idea of Jessa's future, I had always planned to give it a go myself, and I wanted to dedicate it to Michelle, for her birthday, and for being a wonderful and perfect friend. Happy Birthday girl!**

**I hope you all enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot I came up with for the fic. Everything else goes to their rightful owners, including Cassandra Clare!**

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It was amazing how one piece of small white plastic could change a woman's life so instantaneously. Or how quickly she would find herself sprawled on the bathroom floor, eyes closed and pondering quietly the sudden turn of events that would lay out the future of the rest of her life—or in this specific woman's case, the next six or so decades.

Tessa gripped the stick in her shaking hands, placed lightly on her stomach as she stared up at the ceiling, wondering how long it would take her to count every tile above her. Anything would have been better than what she would inevitably be forced to do, thanks to the very object still in her grasp. Neither she nor Jem had planned for this, and though both had tinkered around with the idea—Jem casually humming a lullaby in the kitchen, Tessa randomly sifting through the very minimal items she had kept from her life with Will, James, and Lucie—neither of them had actually come out into the open about it, and now they had no choice.

Tessa was pregnant, and the Silent Brothers had confirmed it.

Despite the intelligence and power the Brothers possessed, Tessa still felt obligated to do it the old-fashioned way, and upon returning home to her and Jem's small flat in London, the half-Shadowhunter had strode purposefully to the bathroom, where she had removed a simple pregnancy test from the box she had stopped off at the store to buy moments earlier. Her fingers were already trembling when she ripped the plastic off the packaging, and looking back on it now, she had no idea why she had been so nervous; after all, the test had been done more for sentimentality than actual uncertainty.

Tessa lifted herself off the floor and gazed down at the stick once more, eyes glazing over at the sight of the small red plus sign staring back up at her. She would have been lying to herself if she said she had not wondered about Jem's stance on starting a family. They had only been married a year and a half, but Jem had made it very clear that he was going by her rules, and with what she felt comfortable. Tessa knew that Jem desired a child, and that even a hundred years ago he'd wanted a family and a life like his parents once had. However, many decades had passed since then, and now Jem was unsure about what he wanted, and that included Tessa's wishes as well. He feared crossing some unspoken line, and that line bore the words "family" and "children" on its surface clear as glass. And like glass, it was liable to break when tested.

Tessa nearly smiled at the idea of telling Jem the news. She could see him in her mind, the image of his equally shocked and ecstatic face forming vividly behind her eyes. He would be happy, beyond happy, and she knew that without a doubt. But how did she feel? Could she raise a family again, after the pain of losing her children the first time around? Would she have the strength to watch her children age until they no longer looked like hers, but rather old friends, and later even grandparents? It had been hard enough back then—she had fled for fear of witnessing her children's deaths. It would undoubtedly only hurt worse a second time.

As Tessa made her way into her and Jem's bedroom, throwing the stick into the trash can without so much as a glance in its direction to see if it fell in or not, she began to imagine her future with Jem and their upcoming child. He would be an amazing father, of that she was absolutely positive. He would be both firm and gentle, and give her all the love in the world. Though fiercely protective, he would also allow her to experience her own adventures, and if she chose the dangerous life of a Shadowhunter someday, then he would let her go, despite the pain it would bring him to see her join in on such a life. Tessa allowed herself to sink into the cushions as the sound of Jem and their daughter's laughter rang in her mind—

A click of the lock shattered her daydream, and Tessa shot up with a start.

"Tessa? Are you home? I was with Emma, but she told me she saw you today, and—"

_Of course he would have been with her,_ Tessa thought with a mental slap. She had briefly wondered where he had gone out to, but he had been spending some quality time with his—distant?—cousin of late, travelling to Los Angeles through portals, and it did not surprise her. It took a moment for her to realize that Jem had stopped speaking, and was standing in the doorway of their bedroom, a white coat draped over his arm. She loved when he wore that coat; it fit well with his willowy figure and long legs. Jem's face was pensive, and his dark eyes were searching hers, filled with worry.

"Are you all right?" he asked, his tone creased with anxiety. Naturally, he would notice that her mind was clouded with millions of overwhelming thoughts, each one battling each other for dominance in her brain. It was no wonder those emotions were displaying themselves on her face. Jem took a step into the room, moving to drop his coat onto the bed. Tessa instinctively took a step back, and Jem's expression immediately dropped, hurt and puzzled at her uneasiness.

Tessa held up a hand, willing it to stop shaking. "I'm fine. Don't let go of that coat." She pointed to the garment still half in Jem's hands. "You'll need to put it right back on. We're going out for a couple hours," she announced.

Jem smiled crookedly, his words drawn out in confusion. "Why the sudden outing? Are we going anywhere specific?"

"Yes," she replied, her thoughts already coming together to fit into the perfect shape, and she knew suddenly how she would tell him. "We are going to Blackfriar's Bridge."

The bridge was just as she remembered it from the time when they had reunited, the memories now blurred and incoherent, though she could still recall the hasty confessions and the hot press of their lips. Five years had passed since that day, and not a second had gone by that she had regretted her decision to follow him and offer to be with him again, to give their love a second chance. Every night, when he held her in his arms, she felt as peaceful as she once had almost a hundred years ago. His kiss sent her nightmares racing away, his hands banished all despairing thoughts, and his smile lit up her world until she couldn't breathe from the beauty of its warmth.

That same smile was gracing his features now as they stepped onto the bridge together, Tessa furiously messing with her wool gloves. It was a nervous habit she had picked up over time, and Jem himself had caught on to it as well.

His breath came out like a puff of smoke as he said, "You know I love when we come here, but I do have to wonder why now, in the middle of winter?"

Tessa glanced down at the light trail of snow covering the railing of the bridge, obscuring the colors lining its surface. It was midday, yet thanks to the cold barely anyone had made the trip out. Still, a steady trickle of cars and civilians came passing over as they walked along the side, and Tessa ignored every single one, her mind set only on the news she was so close to voicing aloud.

She stopped abruptly, recognizing the bench she had sat on the day she had first seen Jem as no longer a Silent Brother, but the man she had fallen in love with so many years ago. She reached for Jem's hands, pulling him so they were nearly chest to chest, and she breathed in the scent of the river and the mint and spice of the winter air, closing her eyes for just a second to gather her thoughts. When she opened them again, she was met with Jem's curious gaze, his black eyes wide, the gold specks almost sparkling as he gave her a bemused smile.

"Tessa—?"

She gripped his fingers, telling him through touch that she needed to speak, and that she could not wait any longer. She shivered, and not from the cold, but from the sudden and immense weight of the words lingering on her tongue.

"I brought us here for a reason, Jem," she told him, attempting to calm her racing heart. "This place has always been ours—it is the one spot in the whole world that I share with no one but you. When I hear its name, I am reminded of us, and the moments that have occurred right here on this bridge." Tessa dropped one of his hands to touch his cheek, which was flushed from the wind. "This is the place where we first talked, and I voiced one of my deepest fears to you. It was the place where you made me feel human, and loved. You took me here when I needed to vent, and you never failed to be the shoulder I could cry on. This bridge is where we met once a year for over a century, even though you were not yourself. Blackfriar's Bridge is as much a part of us as everything else in our lives, and I want it to be the place where life-changing moments happen. After all, here is where our life together began anew. It belongs to us, and only us."

Jem's mouth was open slightly, but he did not speak, and Tessa could not pinpoint the emotion she saw on his face, but instead of trying to decipher it, she hurried on. "Because this is the place where our lives begin, I wanted to take you here so I could tell you something—something important. I—" she froze, her throat closing up in fear and doubt. She hesitated—could she really say this aloud? "I am…"

Jem cupped her face in his hands, his thumb stroking her cheek, and she immediately relaxed under his touch. Her breathing slowed to a normal rhythm, and she felt her pulse lessen as he placed his forehead against hers. Their noses nearly grazed each other's as he whispered, "What is it? You know you can tell me anything. Do not be scared."

He pressed his lips against hers briefly, and the minute he pulled away, her heart soared and she confessed in a burst of courage, "I'm pregnant, James. I'm going to have a baby."

A million ideas had run through her head all day as to the first words he would say upon hearing her news. She imagined him stuttering, stumbling over his sentences, all words lost. She thought that perhaps he would grin uncontrollably, and embrace her so hard she would be left gasping for air. What she had not expected was the actual reaction he gave her.

His mouth parted, and his eyes narrowed, and for a moment he looked to be contemplating the meaning of the universe, and just when Tessa's nerves began to make themselves known once again, he spoke.

"You're p—pregnant. With…our…child." He spoke as if it was his first time using the English language. His eyes locked with hers. "The child _is_ mine, right?"

Tessa, despite herself, broke into an uncontrollable fit of laughter at his question, tears brimming in her eyes. It was so like him, to ask such a ridiculous thing, but with such a serious tone. She covered her mouth and attempted to stifle it, watching Jem's baffled expression start to shift into something else entirely—a joy she had never seen before on his face. He took a deep breath and nodded, encouraging her to respond.

"Of course she's yours!" Tessa giggled, burying her face in the soft fur of Jem's jacket. She could hear his heartbeat, racing at an almost inhuman pace. She barely felt his hands sliding down her back, one hugging her waist and the other tangling itself in the tresses of her hair.

"She…" Jem mumbled. "We're having a girl. A child. A girl child. A child who is a girl."

Tessa chuckled again, wishing she could see his face, but he was holding her against him too tightly for her to witness anything but the rapid rise and fall of his chest. "How many different ways are you going to phrase that sentence?" she asked, unable to stop smiling.

"I—I don't—I do not know. I am simply—I mean, I have never felt like this before. Tess," Jem pulled back then, and Tessa finally caught sight of his expression, and she wished suddenly that she was an author, someone with the innate ability to capture in words the beauty of his face at that moment. Every part of him seemed to be glowing, until he resembled an angel more than a human. He was looking at her as if she were the answer to every one of his dreams, only greater. She tried to fix him with the same look, and hoped that he could see her excitement and love, pouring out of her in waves.

Tessa wiped a tear from her eye and said softly, "I know you do not think you are good with words, but at least try to finish a coherent sentence."

Jem beamed at her, and his arms tightened even more so around her waist, pressing her flush against him. "You are all right with this? I mean, after everything that happened before, with Will and your previous children, I want to know the truth. Forget me for a moment. Do you want this?"

For a second, Tessa was bewildered that Jem would ask her such a thing, but it was Jem, and he was nothing if not constantly selfless and caring, gentle and kind. "I will not lie to you, James," she answered, pressing her palms against his chest. "I was conflicted when I first found out. But now, standing here on this bridge with you, I am reminded of why I wanted this in the first place. I don't care about the pain, or the future, or anything but this moment, right now. I want this, Jem. I really, truly do."

Tessa nearly gasped as Jem crashed his lips against hers, much more forcefully than before. It was not long before the familiarity came back to her, and Tessa melted into the kiss, tasting the mint and the snow and reveling in the feel of his breath as it mixed with her own. He lifted her in his arms then, and Tessa kicked her legs up, deepening the kiss and sighing into his mouth, her arms wrapped around his neck. He grinned against her lips, and whispered words only she could hear.

"Wo ai ni, Tessa. For once, I do not fear the future, so long as it's here with you."

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**A/N: A lot of my friends and I were discussing the idea that Jem and Tessa may have a child someday, and we all came up with our ideas as to how it would go down. This was my mental image. Hope you guys liked it, and as usual, please drop me a review. Even just a note would make my day! Thank you!**


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